Madonna Wants to Give it to You… Balls Deep

I’ve got to say, Madonna came into the spotlight just as I was learning the sweet little truth that girls are not yucky. At the tender age of eight I saw Madonna writhing on the floor in a wedding dress singing Like A Virgin. Teen boys everywhere, including myself, were hooked. She was trashy and sexy and very unlike every girl I had seen before… until the next day at school when every girl and her mother had lace gloves and a fake mole drawn on her upper lip but I digress.

Back to the gossip… Ok screw it, I’ll rant no more and just present you with the dirt. Enjoy the chuckle, feel the discomfort, ask yourself (with all your 1984 boy hood innocence), “would I let Madonna manhandle me?”.

Madonna was spotted leaving London’s Claridge’s Hotel toting a see-through plastic bag which revealed her latest purchase – a strap-on sex toy.

Apparently it’s a Purple Penetrator, so perhaps Madonna really does wear the trousers in her relationship. Husband Guy Ritchie, who trailed behind looking rather sheepish, had a carry case of his own, but had the good grace to keep its contents under wraps.

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