Royal Flush’s Highly Educated look at Hollywood’s Greatest Toilet Scenes
Written by Paul Cress, Illustrations by Adam Roth
We here at the Flush have always had a spot close to our hearts for the Cinema of the Scatological. From the dawn of man, we’ve tossed poop at each other for a laugh and today we still find a cheap guffaw in our fecal follies. So, to honor our primitive predilections we have picked out our top three scenes of anal exploits because your man’s been workin’ hard.
He’s worth a deuce!
So let’s plunge right in, shall we? Our Number 3 slot goes to a scene from that ‘90s heart warming comedy, Trainspotting, where Ewan McGregor’s heroin-induced ‘dragon chasing’ took him to the bowels of his being, literally diving head first into a shitted up Scottish toilet, giving new meaning to the term “getting shit faced.”
Hey, we’ve all worked for “Number 2” at some point in our lives (the day after Thanksgiving, after going to an all you can eat taco bar in Tijuana, after turning 30…), but Austin Powers was no piece o’ shits bitch when he was mistaken for shitting so hard that he nearly blew out his “O ring.” “Who does number 2 work for?” Clearly, Austin Powers at is our Number 2 position!
Okay, our coveted Number 1 spot for our favorite number 2, goes to the ultimate in cinematic colon purging. You know, any good film makes you really feel what the characters are going through. Dumb and Dumber is no different. The anguish and torture Jeff Daniels endures at the hands of Jim Carrey and a bottle of laxative rivals any Meryl Streep performance. Kudos, Mr. Daniels! ♠